My first boudoir shoot PT 2

On May 16^th I had my first boudoir shoot.

My friend Annika Roser was in town. She runs a successful studio in Boston call Ma Cherie studios and makes mean scrambled eggs.

I’ve been a boudoir photographer since 2009, But I’ve never had photos taken of me!! I was so nervous about the shoot that I couldn’t sleep the night before!

Annika booked the location of this shoot and it was in a mansion in Sarasota. I could not believe that she booked such a beautiful location! I lugged my suitcase stuffed full of underwear and shoes into this beautiful house. My stomach was in knots the entire time. I laid out all my skimpy outfits and tacky shoes. We decided on what outfits to wear and proceeded to have my hair and makeup done. The entire time mentally freaking out saying to myself, “oh my god, am I REALLY doing this?”

This was more than a simple boudoir shoot. Annika had a crew on set video taping the experience. The production crew pulled me aside to ask a few questions. I was so nervous that my voice was shaking and I could not stop fidgeting. The cameraman asked me things, If the shoot was me trying to look like someone else of if it was me trying to be the most beautiful version of myself? My answer, “I am always beautiful and I am always unapologetically me.” They asked more questions about the difference between a boudoir shoot and a shoot for a magazine centerfold. Which had me realize that boudoir is different It’s not about being someone else’s kind of beautiful it’s about being your own kind of sexy. Then he asked, “What do you do to get ready?” in which I replied, The only correct answer “Listen to Beyonce on blast!!”

Annika and I headed up to the bedroom where I slipped into my first outfit. Annika directed me to move my head this way, move your leg that way. I was sweating bullets and nervous, then she showed me a shot from the back of the camera and I looked FABULOUS!! It was on!! I listened to her directions with out question at this point and no matter how much I hated arching my back or the leg cramps, I know that I looked hot!! Eventually, Annika had me on the ground doing what felt like the most ridiculous yoga poses EVER!! Somewhere in the middle of all this, I felt like the sexiest thing on earth! I stopped worrying about if my thighs looked big or if my chin looked fat, I just felt amazing!! It ended too quickly and I was sad when it was over.

That night I drove home to my fiancé and was on a high, feeling sexier than ever before. It felt like the equivalent of fitting into your high school jeans, getting a new hair cut and a shopping spree at Victoria Secret all rolled into one. It has been over a week now and I still feel amazing. This experience showed me why what I do is important.

I know that I am a plus size girl and am not afraid to admit it. Sometimes it is just hard to see size zero girls with perfect skin and teeth but we all forget that no one really looks like that!!! During my photo shoot I was that beautiful girl!! My makeup was perfect, hair was sexy and I had a photographer who shot me from angles that made me look fabulous!! I almost didn’t recognize myself! It reminded me what of how beautiful I am. I am a size 14; I am sexy and amazing with every inch of my body.

This experience has made me fall in love with what I do all over again. If I can make any girl feel half as good as this shoot made me feel, then what I do is very valuable and important.